Part of my job as an RA in the dorm is to facilitate "programs," which are basically events for my residents. They can promote community service, or be educational, social or academic. And while I've done everything from teach my girls how to properly spray paint, to tye-dying shirts, to freerice.com competitions, to throwing an outrageous 80s prom, my specialty is in alcohol awareness programs.
Last year I put together a program for Cross and Jones Halls called "Beer Goggle Dodgeball."
We borrowed these goggles that resemble swim gear, but effectively impair ability to walk or see properly. They're usually used in demonstrations by different Police Departments, and are used for mock sobriety testing. But we just had everybody strap on a pair and play dodgeball, hence the name of the program.
It was a great tournament.
The catch was, "when you're drinking and driving, it's not a fair to everyone else on the road."
So four people would put on thebeer goggles and they'd play against this guy, Justin, and I, (who, as it happened, didn't have to wear any goggles,) and they'd lose every time.
That's because "you have a better shot at being a winner when you're sober."
Yeah.
I could totally work for a lame school board somewhere making up assembly presentations. I'm great at being cheesy. I should probably get paid for that crap.
But anyways, this year, I topped even Dodgeball.
Drum roll please:
Root Beer Pong.
Cross Hall Main Lobby.
Wednesday Feb. 17
8 PM
This program is a spoof of a drinking game commonly used with the non-root type of beer and is played customarily by American College students. We also played flip cup, and kings cup.
Aye.
The A&W was flowing, and tummy aches were had by all.
I'd say about 45 dorks ended up hanging out pretending to be drunk with our red party cups.
What they didn't know was that I had the Cops agree to come fake Bust our shindig.
At approximately 8:35 the police stormed in and cut the stereo off (which was a shame because whitesnake was serenading us with the big chorus of "Here I go Again") and yelled at everyone, and chased the few that made a break for it, and wrote us all tickets.
They interrogated us about where we got the root beer, and they arrested the 21+ year old who brought it, and did field sobriety tests for those that claimed to only be drinking water.
It was a pretty sweet bust, and then alcohol awareness presentation ensued.
They gave a 25 minute presentation about the risks and consequences of underage drinking, detailed the possible fines and outcomes of a pull over, and answered the often wondered questions about what is and isn't usable in the courtroom.
For sure the best program I've ever put on.
Seemed like everybody partied pretty hard for it being a Wednesday, but they all left pretty happy. Especially the boys that took home the Walmart gift cards for winning the pong tournament.
The irony in it all is that while the program did raise awareness of the perils of underage intoxication, it also taught a lot of BSM and Wesley kids how to play drinking games.
Oops.
Oh well.
Other than the whole being a bad influence on the devout, I'd say I'm dang good at my job.
Do Stuff You're Good at.
Do Stuff You Like.
"Pleasure in the Job
Puts Perfection in the Work."
-Aristotle
